The Khasis/Jaintias have table etiquettes, some of which are being followed till date. Despite having lived the modernized life and different styles of living, it would be interesting to know that such traditional beliefs and practices are still very much a part of the households here in Meghalaya. Some interesting terms such as bang kti in Khasi are used to describe good cooking or make any item taste better than others. There are more interesting practices that would be worth recalling and teaching our young ones, who are not to be blamed if they are not familiar with such community norms. Khat ja nong Sohra is an expression to say where the rice is sliced very promptly while serving like they do in Sohra. However, if any kind of eatable is accidentally dropped on the ground, it is considered that the particular portion is for the land (bam ka khyndew) to consume.
What is mentioned in this article may be eating norms that are similar in beliefs and also followed in other tribes and communities across the globe. The writer has documented the same while interacting with individuals who are familiar with such practices. Respect for food (burom ia ka bam ba bam) is something that we hold utmost importance to, irrespective of whether we are believers or whether we belong to niam Tynrai.
Table manners:
For our folks from the War area and other places in the State, dropping rice pieces is strictly forbidden, as it would indicate disrespecting the food one is consuming. It is advisable to pick up the rice pieces by hand and not use a broom. Accordingly, the upbringing of the children has been in a similar context and that is to never throw away rice or drop it while eating. Sitting cross-legged while eating also implies not respecting the food s/he is eating and is not considered a right posture acceptable while eating. The donts also include singing/humming while eating.
One is not supposed to talk with food in their mouth or make any loud munching/slurp sounds. We are also not supposed to talk while eating, as what we consumed is believed to not be beneficial for us and our bodies (her noh u soh khaw). It is also a not allowed gesture to use the expression such as Sheesh to show disappointment and or annoyance for food. It is like not being grateful to Gods blessings for the food He has provided for us.
While eating, we are not supposed to rest our chin in the palm of our hand or rest our hand at the table. We are supposed to eat in a good relaxed posture without any thoughts. A pleasing heart and a pleasing mind and eating without any kind of annoyance and irritability is the right way of eating in order to show respect to the food (bam suk mynsiem). This also would mean sitting in the right posture.
Kitchen beliefs:
The common beliefs when it comes to kitchen dos and don’ts is cutting of nails and combing of hair in the kitchen, which is a no-no. Other don’ts in the kitchen are to sweep the kitchen after dinner and to throw the dirt away. Both signify that you have thrown away the days hard work and whatever you have invested during the day in terms of energy; work and money are all wasted for that particular day.
We also believe that we are not supposed to keep the rice utensil absolutely empty during the night, because the lei iing whom we believe are there in all houses would visit us and would be displeased if the kitchen is dry (tyrkhong) without any food in the utensil. We have to always keep rice in the utensil which we believe is soh khaw blei. While arranging utensils, it is supposed to be done properly. Rashly arranging it is again considered disrespecting the kitchen and the utensils one is using which may result in uncalled arguments in the household.
Of course, what is commonly practice till date is pinching rice from the kitchen and putting it in the bag/baggage while travelling, which we believe will prevent any kind of evil eye or any negative vibes. One is prohibited to spin the plate or the cover of utensils or the utensils. Usage of the serving spoons should also be used carefully, ensuring it is not used for other purposes. For instance, using the serving spoons to beat the children in the olden days is considered sang (an act which is strictly forbidden). After eating, one is not supposed to leave the plate dry but has to sprinkle water on it. Leaving the plate dry is believed to chase the food away. When there is a storm, it is believed that taking the wooden serving spoon (siang dieng) and putting it at the fencing area of the compound will protect the house from the storm.
Using of utensils:
Using utensils, cutleries, and ceramics which are broken are not encouraged especially while serving food to guests as it is considered unfortunate (‘jem daw’ as we would explain it). We also believe that knives should not be given just like that. If you do, you will be required to take some amount like you would have bought it. Amongst relatives, neighbours, and known people, they would take a rupee or two just to follow the norm.
While cooking, we would have to stir the food gently and not hit the utensil, if food is stuck to the cooking spoon. If we do so, it would signify chasing away the food its benefits (beh ne pynsyrwa ia ka bam). However, if a birthday is celebrated at home, the food should be served firstly to the birthday person, before it is served to anybody in the gathering. This practice is to strike luck and good wishes (ieh daw, ieh rngiew).
While serving food on normal occasions, the first serving is kept aside (buh sharud ba ainguh) as a mark of gratitude to the gods for providing the food which is called the ja khlieh khiew. The serving pattern here is while serving the food; the serving spoon is tilted towards the left and then put on the plate. It is also strictly prohibited to eat the food directly from the utensil. One has to serve it on the plate before eating it even if it has to be for tasting salt etc. Also eating uncooked rice is a ‘no’ thing as it will bring bad luck to the person (ba shem pap).
Significance to explain such practices and beliefs for our young ones:
Imparting such knowledge to your young ones may be imperative especially when such beliefs and practices are rooted in ones culture and tradition. Some months ago, I saw a teenager playing around with his plate after eating, and in my effort to explain to him that such an act is forbidden in our culture (ba sang as we would have tagged it), this young boy seemed astonished with my explanation as to why he shouldnt have done what he did.
I then realized that he is not to be blamed as he was never told/taught on the importance that we the Khasis/Jaintias give to food, the utensils that we use, the respect (burom ia ka bam) that we give to our kitchen and so on. Table etiquettes for our young ones may imply only while going out to eat or for formal dinners on occasions.
The Khasi ancestors, who are considered to have had immense wisdom since time immemorial, are believed to be familiar with how the human body functions which is why we have our snacks which are sugar-less and salt-less, yet are tasty and very healthy for consumption. The only difference between people in the older generations and now is, earlier, when we were prohibited to do anything with regard to food (rice), we were briefly explained as to why it was so. In todays era, prohibiting without properly being able to explain does not hold any merit as kids want logical answers and not beliefs. Also, the cultural practices are being questioned even more, especially when we have lost out on elders who could explain to us their significance.
(The writer can be reached at maxwell.lyngdoh@gmail.com)
